Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is this the sara with the beer cane?
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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