Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
