Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
