Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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