You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
