Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
we should paint friendship bongs
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
