Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize