i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
