using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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