garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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