It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
