I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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