i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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