Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
