I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize