So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
They have beer where we have blood.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
