My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Randomize
