Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Randomize
