This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
