This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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