the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize