You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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