How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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