32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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