I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize