About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
