holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
