ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I just blew my weed a kiss
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
