actually, I'm a sock model
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
