Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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