so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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