So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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