went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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