He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
