if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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