it hurts more in the daytime
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
