I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
