fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
