Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
