sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
