you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
