I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
