I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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