u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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