sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
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please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
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