so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
A bitchslap is in order.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize