Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
im holly from the hills drunk
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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