Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Randomize
