I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
