So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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